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I’ll never forget the sound of his little feet on the cold tile floor as he staggered around the corner to my wife and me as I anxiously awaited my first meeting with my 3-year-old son.
Our emotions ran high: excitement, nervousness, gratitude, disbelief, joy.
I also feel a tinge of sadness, and even guilt, knowing that without the determination of my wonderful wife, Sarah, and the words shared by the priest at the retreat, I could have easily missed this most precious moment. I did. 2 years ago: “What defines you in your life, your ‘yes’?”
Adoptive mothers tell us common misconceptions about adoption and adoption.
For years, Sarah developed a special and enduring desire to adopt one of the thousands of children overseas who have been orphaned simply because they had an extra chromosome in their DNA. He was expressing his longing for me.
Unfortunately, I was initially resistant to this beautiful idea.
We already had five wonderful children who we loved dearly. And when I grew up in the ’80s and ’90s, the culture there emphasized having “healthy” children and “perfect” families. I didn’t feel ready to accept the responsibility of adoption, much less adopting a so-called “disabled” child. hindrance. ‘
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I now see that my thinking back then was deeply flawed. The truth is, I was letting fear get the best of me.
Because of Sarah’s courage, I was able to find my own courage. Shortly after giving birth to her fifth child, she asked me to consciously pray and reflect on her constant desire to hold a child in need.
While I was on a men’s prayer retreat, questions that encouraged me to choose “yes” echoed over and over again, filling me with the confidence I had previously lacked.
We met our son Rex Stephan on Valentine’s Day. It’s no exaggeration to say he stole our hearts. In fact, he repaired them in ways we never thought possible.
Knowing I was completely on board, Sarah quit her job and we prepared for the adoption process. This is a long, tedious, and expensive endeavor that requires a great deal of planning and flexibility. Shortly thereafter, the pandemic hit and we worked hard to maintain our qualifications and the funding we needed for our next steps.
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However, we soon realized that we were not alone. The community flocked to us, offering support, encouragement, and support. Our confidence grew even stronger as hurdle after hurdle was solved before our eyes.
Grants and gifts poured in, as well as some stimulus checks that friends and family didn’t want or need. As a bonus, we also received an email from Bree’s Gift. Bree’s Gift is Bree John Leehas promised to cover the remaining dues.

Matt Ephhauser and Sara Ephhauser in Belgrade with Rex Stefan
It was a photo of an adorable Serbian boy with the most innocent brown eyes and the happiest smile that gave us, and our community, a boost of energy. We knew at first glance that he was our son.
The waiting time was long and difficult. But after more than a year, we finally received permission to come to Serbia and take our son home.

We met our son Rex Stephan on Valentine’s Day. It’s no exaggeration to say he stole our hearts. In fact, he repaired them in ways we never thought possible.
This was the child God set aside for us to repair our broken bonds, the one we would love and care for for the rest of our lives.
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How beautiful it was to ride in the car, walk through busy streets, try new foods, meet his brother who surprised him, and be with him with his eyes wide open. Airport after returning home.
This was the child God set aside for us to repair our broken bonds, the one we would love and care for for the rest of our lives.
Rex completed our family. I feel as if he is one of those wonderful children who is always there and adds light to our home. He made our “perfect” family even more perfect than we could have ever imagined.
This November, Adoption Month, we have to share how our family needs Rex, my five biological children, my wife, and especially me. Our community needs him too. As well as the church members who loved him dearly. And in our community schools, hundreds of students know his name and root for him.
It’s shocking to think that here in America, and especially in places like Eastern Europe, children are tragically aborted every day because of a possible diagnosis of Down syndrome. Parents are made to believe that “tough” equals “bad,” and these lies are holding back their beautiful daughters, sons, brothers, and friends from coming out into the world.
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Children like Rex are much more than the small percentage of children who are considered “disabled.” Their joy, humor, love, energetic spirit, and human dignity are what define them, not their labels. Like all children, they deserve endless love.
Rex is now a thriving 5-year-old. But less than two years after his son was born, I can confidently say that the wonders of adoption will be the best “yes” ever.