Let’s all take a breather. After two solid weeks of partying, it finally came the day after his Derby in Kentucky.
We are so blessed to live in Bluegrass State, where limestone waters produce the world’s best bourbon and the world’s fastest horses. Johnny Cam Reilly, bluegrass bandwagon jumper, transplanted New Yorker, I’ve been celebrating the Kentucky Derby for as long as I can remember. Even when I grew up in the Big Apple, the Cappiello family always marked the first Saturday in May for rolling out Scungilli Fra Diavolo, struffoli, black and white cookies, and celery soda. It’s meant to celebrate the Kentucky Derby from billions of miles away.
In any case, the Derby season was successfully completed. From boat races and kingfish dining on the banks of the Belle Riviere to (Derby Day) annual prayers to St. Bruno, the patron saint of parking lots, we did it all in style.
But if you’re like me and you hit the track every year with great success, maybe now you’re sitting on the back terrace, slipping your feet on the railing, sipping a Bloody Mary, wondering what to do with all those winnings. You’re thinking… And if you’re reading this column the day after the Derby, you know full well that you’re a gardener. Give your garden a little boost.
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And thoughtful and thoughtful, I offer suggestions for just about any budget.
Win $1,000,000 to $50,000,000 in the Kentucky Derby
Jeff Koons Gazing Ball Sculpture (Van Gogh Wheatfield with Crows)
Sure, some are available at your local big box store for a fraction of a penny, but if you’re looking to make a Kentucky Derby-sized statement in your yard, you’ll want a finer ball. picture. At the front of each painting, painstakingly reproduced by the artist, is a glowing blue hand-blown glass gaze sphere that provides a distorted reflection of both the painting and the observer.
But given the price tag on these products, I’ll be hiding the Cheeze Wiz before next year’s Derby party.
If you win between $200,000 and $1,000,000 in the Kentucky Derby
Hartley Victorian Greenhouse for Your Backyard
Who gardener does not need a greenhouse? And if you’re going to a greenhouse, why go to an essentially landscaped plastic shed? The good news is that when you drop this kind of cash into a greenhouse, it really takes care of itself. The machine will not break down during the bitter cold of winter. The potted plant doesn’t need water when he sets off on his month-long trip to Bali. Why, if you’re stuck late at the office sometimes, you can even walk your dog. What better gift for Derby-winning ticket holders?
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If you win $20,000 to $80,000 in the Kentucky Derby
Add a koi pond and waterfall to your garden
The first two may be a bit overkill, but this is easily justified. I mean how many years of college do kids really need you to cover? Get over them in a year or two at most. Then, while they do a good job as neighborhood baristas, the next he should definitely be able to pay two, three, or ten years. You deserve this, you really do.
If you win $5,000 in the Kentucky Derby
BCS Model 732 Rear Tine Rotor Tiller electronic start, double cone spring clutch, dual forward and reverse working speeds, Powered by Kohler Command Pro CH396 engine
If you’re the kind of gardener who likes to challenge the forces of physics through gardening, this is right your alley. You don’t deserve the best when working with stubble. Ok, that’s $5,000… for a cultivator. It may seem a little unreasonable. But let’s do a little math here. Spending 20 hours each spring and fall hand-turning garden beds, composting, or otherwise accidentally using Kentucky modeling clay to actually support the growth of crops that someday won’t be able to destroy completely. Trying to turn it into something we can do, and doing it every year for the next 20 years is 422,365 light-years of painstaking work, and when you think about it, it’s not in the best health interest.
Don’t doctors always tell you to work smarter instead of working harder to avoid straining your joints, back, etc.? This isn’t some crazy midlife crisis toy you sit in a lawn chair in your garage and stare at affectionately. This is a loyal investment in your health and well-being. Seen this way, it seems like a fairly simple decision…
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If you win $1,000 in the Kentucky Derby
antique french copper watering can
Ok, $1,000 for a watering can? But let’s be honest, he just spent $5,000 on the cultivator. From that perspective, a $1,000 watering can looks pretty cheap. And think how good it makes you feel. Every time you pick up that low-budget baby, your hands go out to all the gardeners of yesteryear who lovingly let their downtrodden staff carry them half a mile at a time to carry water to their far away gardens. physically connected.
If you win $100 in the Kentucky Derby
Burgon and Ball Border Spade and Digging Fork
But after considering all of the above items, the Kentucky Derby winnings are trivial, including paying off the mortgage, repairing the car’s transmission, and finally replacing the sliding glass door that was stuck in the same place. If you decide to use it to pay for things, the last decade has something you shouldn’t overlook. According to their website, Burgon and Ball “..have been working with steel in Sheffield since 1730…”
I think they have figured it out by now. And a border spade that is slightly smaller than a full digging spade is great. And hey, that handle has been tested with a breaking force of 90kg. I think it’s like 200,000 quarks…
Happy (post) Derby!
Paul Cappiello is Executive Director of Yudel Botanical Gardens, 6220 Old Lagrange Road, yewdelgardens.org..
