Difficult conversations are part of life, but many people don’t know how to hold them. Whether you’re discussing sensitive topics with friends or confronting colleagues about workplace issues, these conversations can be uncomfortable and even intimidating.
in various scenes everywhere “rehearsal,” Latest episodes of hit HBO shows InheritanceThe characters are trying to have a difficult conversation, but it’s as if the air is thick with tension and suspicion. You may have been in a similar situation in the past. I hesitate to speak frankly because I fear it will be used or twisted into something it isn’t. Thing.
Watching Roys make a series of common mistakes gives us a chance to think about the right way to have a difficult conversation in real life.
They didn’t start with a foundation of trust.
Trust is the necessary foundation for difficult conversations. A lack of trust can be seen in nearly every family and business relationship depicted on the show.
When trust is lost, people are less likely to communicate honestly and are more likely to be misunderstood. It’s a vicious circle that you can’t get out of. Without trust, people are reluctant to take responsibility for their actions, prolonging conflicts and making it harder to find solutions.
Building trust requires shared goals of vulnerability, integrity, understanding and respect. It’s not always easy, but it’s essential for effective communication and healthy relationships.
They tried to be motivated by fear.
In the episode, Logan, the fierce patriarch of the Roy family, visits the ATN newsroom. He walks around in dark sunglasses, hovering menacingly over employees writing emails, then unleashes fiery speeches. His words carry an impassioned desire to win the competition.
Fear is a powerful emotion that drives people to action. However, when it is used as a primary motivation, it has detrimental effects on both individuals and organizations. research I found. When fear dominates, it creates a toxic work environment that undermines trust, stifles creativity and innovation, and leads to high turnover. Fear-based leaders tend to be controlling and critical, leaving little room for employees to exercise their own judgment and creativity. This can lead to decreased job satisfaction, increased stress and anxiety, and even mental health problems such as depression and anxiety disorders.
They avoided talking about hard truths.
In the episode, Logan’s assistant (and possibly girlfriend) Kelly submits an audition tape to become an ATN anchor. Her cranky performance is obvious to anyone who watches her tape, but no one wants to admit her truth or tell her. Tom is tasked with relaying this news to Kelly, and he cowardly hands it to Greg, but Greg doesn’t get the message across as well as you might imagine, and the nonexistent Focus receives criticism from his group. condemn the
Greg teaches Kelly the classic “feedback sandwich” technique of sandwiching constructive feedback between two positive comments. Research shows that this approach is often ineffective because it dilutes the impact of constructive feedback, confuses recipients, and focuses attention on positive comments to miss or not take important feedback seriously. shown. Additionally, feedback sandwiches can be viewed as dishonest or manipulative, especially if the positive comments are not genuine or related to the feedback.
Feedback sandwiches may seem like a kind and gentle approach to providing feedback, but they are most effective in helping others improve their performance and behavior, and to take what you say seriously. not in a targeted or efficient way. Like Kelly, the recipient may end up questioning everything you say. may give. You may have a hard time finding positive comments to interpose your feedback, delaying the delivery of important feedback.
They made a dishonest apology.
During a key scene in the episode, Kendall, Shiv, and Roman find themselves at a karaoke bar. His father shows up unexpectedly and tries to convince him to support him in his latest business deal. What’s surprising is that Logan holds out olive branches to the kids, seems to be trying to make a personal connection, and even seems to apologize for his behavior lately. But if that means a lot to you, I’m sorry. ”
Apologies are powerful tools for mending damaged relationships, restoring trust, and promoting forgiveness. A sincere apology justifies and acknowledges the hurt we have caused and reduces negative emotions such as anger and resentment. Apologies benefit both the apologist and the recipient by increasing empathy, forgiveness, and relationship satisfaction. in fact, research It shows that apologizing can make us feel more sincere, promote personal growth, and increase self-awareness.
Despite these advantages, we often avoid apologizing because we fear it will make us look weak or because we think it does no good. Apologizing can improve our relationship and leave us in a better place than before we made the mistake. A sincere apology, even after committing a grave sin, can help build trust and intimacy in a relationship.
When apologizing, it is imperative to include specific content important factorexpress remorse, take responsibility for one’s actions, offer to rectify things, etc. Explaining our actions, admitting wrongdoing, acknowledging the harm caused, promising change, and asking for forgiveness may also help. , goes a long way in building stronger bonds based on honesty and accountability.
There are so many moments throughout the episode where a character is faced with the choice of participating in a difficult conversation and decides to avoid it. But in the long run, this can be a recipe for disaster. can be much larger than
Additionally, avoiding tight conversations can undermine trust and credibility in our personal and professional relationships. It can lead to misunderstandings, resentment, and ultimately the complete breakdown of the relationship. You can build stronger relationships based on that and create more positive outcomes for everyone involved.
